Tempest

Monday, 4 December 2006

A world without formalities…

People always tell you “there are no sorry’s and thank you’s in friendship”. “You don’t have to say that, we are friends after all”. They magnanimously tell you that you can take them for granted just because they have pledged their friendship to you. They honestly and truly believe that they will shower you with love and favours unconditionally without expecting anything in return.

Why then does dissatisfaction and hurt arise and exist? Why then do people feel betrayed and bitter towards acts of disloyalty? How do they expect people they love and cherish to respect them and pay them back in kind? Or if not pay them back, at least be grateful and thankful.

“It is then said that actions speak louder than words”. “I don’t expect my friends to thank me everytime I do something for them but I do know they’ll stand by me”. But how do you know that? How can you be so sure that those that you yourself have allowed to take you for granted will in forms of action repay you or stand by you in times when you need it?

Maybe they will. Maybe you have been lucky enough to amass such friends. But sometimes there never does arise a situation when someone can/needs to do you an act of kindness or loyalty. Then how do you know that you and your efforts have been appreciated? That you are important and your every good deed has not gone unseen?

Why be a hypocrite to yourself and deny yourself the momentary pleasure and warm glow of simple words like ‘thank you’ and ‘it means a lot to me’. You know they make you happy. I don’t believe that the logic of “it is a selfless deed” exists. Who are you kidding? When you do something for others, it makes you feel happy. That is not a selfless deed. There is no such thing as a selfless deed.

Miscommunication. What is the pain conjoined to that word? When your efforts seem wasted, when your acts of affection go unappreciated, when your moments of thoughtfulness are enjoyed unacknowledged? No one has to do anything for anyone. It is not a given that your parents must love you. It is not a given that your friends must care for you. It is never a given that your lover must be ever loyal to you. Each and every moment wherein someone else made a small adjustment for you is a blessing. Appreciate it and let others appreciate you.
Small words like ‘sorry’ and ‘thank you’ make big words like ‘miscommunication’ disappear! It might seem too simple, like Aristootle said, 'in the simple truths lie the wisest most profound answers to life'.

Posted by Pavitra :: 08:08 :: 5 comments